The shade of it all

This subject is a delicate one.  I believe stongly that people are people.  Race and culture influence us all.  However,  it's a small fraction of our true existence.  In the black community, Indian, and Hispanic we have gone as far as separating ourselves even further by the shade of skin.  Sounds ridiculous but it is very real.  It was a time that this seem prodominate in the black male with the women he chose to pursue.  But as we have evolved as a people and black women have adopted the skin tone theory as well.  We can turn on our televisions and see mostly black women who have a higher social status dating and marrying fair skinned men.  Even our own First Lady is among these women.  Before you chew me up and spit me out just think about it Oprah, the women on Alanta house wives, Star Jones and J Hud.  The men that these women chose weren't even their equals financially.  Arm candy is not just for guys anymore.  It could be that back women are tired of competing with women of non color.  Perhaps they have adopted the thought "can't beat em join them".  So our star of Scandle said light skinned?   Give me a white man.  Robin Thickes wife seems like a very happy women.  Women do the choosing and men do the chasing.  Are we choosing according to a lowered self esteem or our we being driven by the ego.  Or could it possibly be a matter of preference?

Love: Why do they come back?

Love: Why do they come back?: Some of us are very familiar with the "break up to make up" relationship. Oh you know the relationship that resembles the Baby Boy scene wh...

Why do they come back?

Some of us are very familiar with the "break up to make up" relationship. Oh you know the relationship that resembles the Baby Boy scene where Jody slaps his girl then the next scene is a passionate love session. The big question is WHY? Why do many women and some men run right back to the person they swore off of? Is the love making that good? Are they addicted to being mistreated? Does the fear of being alone trump everything else? For some all of the above but for most one trumps the other. Fellas, women can definitely function being single but trust they don't want to. Oddly a lot of women walk away from the man they categorized as a scrub to walk into the arms of another scrub. It's not easy looking in the mirror and facing the fact that you get what you put out . A lot of women go to the victim role but the truth is men do the chasing but women do the choosing. So a women may find herself ping pinging back and forward between bad to worse. It's true you can be addicted to love. Especially that of a person who for some reason just does it for you. Ladies the sad part is if a man isn't that into you but knows you addicted.....you will be drug on a long string until he gets tired of walking you. Oh, and sorry this is true even if there are major fireworks in the boom boom room. It is what it is a man will only change for "the one". If over the course of your relationship you have scene no change the your not "the one". Finally there's fear. It only comes to do 3 things to kill, to steal, and to destroy. The fear of being alone can be ironically suffocating. So many will go back not to experience that feeling. The worse is to be hit with all at once. This combo will have the most refined and dignified ladies taking earrings off and meeting the other women at her job. Anyone, can fall victim to the boomerang relationship but needy people seem to stay in them. These people lack true love from within and frankly this fills that void. The truth is rather your the boomerang or the tossed its unhealthy for all parties involved mentally and potentially physically. So if you left once...twice.. numerous times before. Before you thrust back in again stop. Remind yourself why you left in the first place. Love Mzchynudol